BUDGET BLOGMAS | DAY NINETEEN: TOP 10 FESTIVE VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE | IN COLLABORATION WITH PRETTY PERFECT PRODUCTS | AD

Hello and welcome to I’m NOT Disordered’s Budget Blogmas!

Today, I thought I’d do a fun post and share some of my favourite, festive videos from YouTube…

BLOGMAS 2020 WITH I’M NOT DISORDERED | RECOMMENDATION TWENTY-ONE: CHRISTMAS SONGS

Hello and welcome to recommendation number twenty-one of Blogmas 2020 with I’m NOT Disordered!

Today, I’ll be sharing with you all my favourite Christmassy tunes and the lyrics I love from each of them; as well as YouTube videos for each…

 

Mariah Carey – All I Want For Christmas

I don’t want a lot for Christmas

There is just one thing I need

I don’t care about the presents

Underneath the Christmas Tree

 

Band Aid – Do They Know It’s Christmas?

It’s Christmas time

There’s no need to be afraid

At Christmas time

We let in light and we banish shade

 

DESIGNING A LINE FOR BANDANA BOWTIQUE & FAVOURITE PHOTOS | CELEBRATING MY CAT’S TWO YEAR ADOPTAVERSARY | AD

*this post is in partnership with Bandana Bowtique*

Just over two years ago my fluffy Maine Coon cat; Dolly, was put to sleep and my lop-eared, Lionhead bunny; Pixie, and I quickly realised that we needed a third member for our family to feel whole. Losing Dolly definitely bonded Pixie because I felt that she was the only one to really understand what it meant to go through that loss. But Pixie was missing having a friend, she would follow me everywhere and was constantly wanting cuddles. And I missed having a cat in my life because I’d had at least one for over ten years (there’d been a family cat while I was living with my Mum)!

So, within a week of losing Dolly, I began looking for a new addition to the family and my Mum came across Emmy (known as Jennifer at the Adoption Centre) on Facebook! Seeing her photo, I had the exact same instinct I’d had with Dolly in that I was absolutely certain that she was meant to be a part of our family. And seeing her very unique markings, I felt a sort of kinship to her because I’ve always felt that my mental health and experiences have made me different and have left me feeling very aware of that. So I felt some sort of empathy for Emmy and immediately decided to visit Willows Cat Adoption Centre… here’s a video of our first meeting:

FIVE SONGS HELPING ME THROUGH MY MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS

I won't live inside your world

'Cause your punches and your names
All your jokes and stupid games
They don't work
No, they don't hurt
Watch them just go right through me
Because they mean nothing to me

-          Grace Vanderwaal – Clay

The huge catalyst for this recent ‘blip’ in my mental health was the news about my abuser’s new job role. It brought back all the old feelings about him – the anger, frustration, sadness… it all came flooding back, overwhelming me and taking over all of the positive thoughts and feelings. To come through the blip, I’m trying to regain some control over all those negative feelings and bring them in check so that they’re manageable and aren’t influencing my thoughts to self-harm or cause me to feel suicidal. Instead, I’m trying to adopt the attitude that no matter what he says or does, I’ll just get on with my life. I have to.

WHEN YOU'VE GOT THAT SONG IN YOUR HEAD | RELATING TO P!NK LYRICS

So, for the past week I’ve have P!NK’s song What About Us in my head and have had it on repeat on Youtube! When I watched the lyric version of the song/video I found myself able to relate it to a lot of different things in my life and that gave me the inspiration to write this post.

If you want to read about the wide range of songs and singers that I relate to different parts on my life, there’s a post here

 We’re not broken just bent, and we can learn to love again

-       Just Give Me A Reason

MY LIFE IN LYRICS

MY CHILDHOOD:

‘Can't nuthin', bring me down (happy)
I said, let me tell you now, unh (happy)
Bring me down, can't nuthin', bring me down (happy, happy, happy)
My level is too high to bring me down (happy, happy, happy)
Can't nuthin' bring me down (happy, happy, happy)
I said

Because I'm happy’

-       Pharrell Williams - Happy

THE IMMEDIATE AFTERMATH OF THE ABUSE: