I’m
so sorry to have to tell you all this but today (16.10.2018) my cat, Dolly was
put to sleep.
Last
Monday (07.10.2018) Dolly got poorly so I took her to the Vets and she was put
on an IV drip of fluids to help ‘flush her system out’ after blood tests showed
that her kidneys weren’t working properly.
She
came home Friday but on Saturday she had four episodes of diarrhea and two of vomiting,
so I took her back in and initially the Vet said they could send her home with
some medication for the nausea and vomiting but my Mum suggested we do a blood
test to put my mind at ease. Even the Vet was surprised with the results; her
kidney function was really bad and so she admitted again for a weekend of fluids
and the plan to do a repeated blood test on Monday (15.10.2018). Again, the
Vets were surprised to find that her kidneys had worsened. They told me that she
could come home, and I remember asking “are you sending her home to die?”
They explained that they thought being at home was the best chance she had to get better because the stress of being Hospital and her aggression towards the staff wasn’t making her feel any better. And they said that if this was going to pass away then we’d know within the week. So, I decided to make sure she had the best week ever and bought her a ton of things from Pets At Home (https://twitter.com/PetsatHome).
They explained that they thought being at home was the best chance she had to get better because the stress of being Hospital and her aggression towards the staff wasn’t making her feel any better. And they said that if this was going to pass away then we’d know within the week. So, I decided to make sure she had the best week ever and bought her a ton of things from Pets At Home (https://twitter.com/PetsatHome).
When
she still wasn’t drinking or urinating (she started eating) the Vets said to
give her one more day before we’d discuss putting her to sleep. Then she had diarrhea
and I know it sounds disgusting, but I literally didn’t think it was going to
stop! I called the Vets straight away and they asked me to bring her in immediately.
I had a bad feeling. I can’t explain it, but I had a bad feeling. I told myself
I’d ask for them to run one last blood test first. In the end, they couldn’t
get the blood sample and it was going to be that they sedated her and
readmitted her which would then stress her, and the Vet explained that even if
they did that, there was no guarantee that it would make a difference when her
bloods had gotten even worse after a weekend of fluids. We decided that the
best thing would be to let her go.
When
the Vet gave her the euthanasia injection he explained it was going into her
tummy, so it would take longer to work. I asked how long, and he told me five
minutes, but he hadn’t even administered the entire injection and she passed
away. The Vet told me that it was a sign of how poorly she was and that she was
ready to go. He said that it may not matter but that he was now certain that we’d
made the right decision. And when I got upset, we hugged, and I hung onto him
as if he were the last piece of Dolly.
Later,
when I was talking to a friend I said ‘it was probably the toughest decision of
my life’ but when I thought on it… I realized that actually, I had said that because
I felt like I should say that. When in fact, it might have been one of the
easiest decisions I ever made. Because in that moment, when I had to make that
decision, I knew which was the right one. I knew which was best for Dolly. And
as hard as it’d be on me to lose her… well, I had to put her first. I put her
first.
The
more people I’ve told, the more real it’s become but I think that I need that.
Because I know from experience that keeping things locked in a box and not
dealing with them…? It just doesn’t work for me. I asked my CPN and Richmond Fellowship
for extra support and both are going to talk to me tomorrow – I explained that
whilst I feel safe, I think that I need support in staying safe.
I
have lots of favourite memories of Dolly, but I think that the one that stands
out the most was on her first Christmas in 2014 when she wouldn’t leave the
purple baubles alone and ended up knocking over the three-foot pink Christmas
tree countless amounts of times.
My
favourite thing about Dolly?
She
was my everything.
Huge thank you to the RSPCA (https://twitter.com/RSPCA_official) and Robson and Prescott Vets (https://twitter.com/RobsonPrescott) for doing everything they could
REST
IN PEACE DOLLY
12.10.2014 – 16.10.2018
