THE 'US' VERSUS 'THEM' DISCUSSION

Cat and Mouse Games

I remember after my very first overdose when the Nurse in Accident and Emergency (A&E) told me that if I were to run away then they’d be calling the Police and immediately I was struck with the sense that I was now in a battle and it was me against them. I think it had to do with the feeling of now being in a game of cat and mouse; they were chasing me. They were trying to find me. Now there was a game to win and perhaps it’s natural, especially for someone who’s normally competitive, to be desperate to win any kind of ‘game.’

A LENGTHY MEDICATION CHAT

I remember in 2009 lying on my bed in my Mum’s home and listening to the whispered conversations downstairs between my Mum and – what felt like – every member of NHS staff! (Realistically, it was a few people from the Crisis Team, two Social Workers, and two Psychiatrists!) When there was a knock on the bedroom door I didn’t expect to see the six foot something Psychiatrist wearing running trainers with his suit! I sat up on the bed and he came into my abnormally, barbie-pink bedroom and sat on the futon in front of me. And then he said one of the sentences that has remained a pivotal moment in my mental health journey and you know, actually… my life! He said: “maybe it’s time we start you on some medication.”

WHY A SUPPORT NETWORK IS A MUST-HAVE IN A MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS

As you’ll have seen in my previous post, I recently had a mental health crisis and I had a rough night last night, so the Crisis Team came out and one of the things they said that really stuck with me was: ‘let’s get you back to a place when you can be giving people amazing advice again.’ And I had a look through my blog and wondered whether I’ve done that a lot recently? Given advice, I mean. So, I thought that almost a week after my crisis, maybe now is the best time to let people know exactly what has gotten me through.

MY RECENT MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS, RESPONSIBILITY & FEELING HOPELESS

I haven’t spoken publicly about this yet, but on Monday I went into a mental health crisis.

It started, believe it or not, with a tummy pain!

I was in my sitting room when the pain came about, and, in agony, I collapsed. Onto the coffee table. My shoulder and arm instantly hurt and with the beginning of the bruising, I made my way to the local Urgent Care Center. I could feel my head getting fuller and fuller… it wasn’t so much the voices at first. It was more thoughts and feelings. As though my thoughts were too long and too detailed to fit inside my little head, and my feelings were too intense and too huge to fit into my little body. And I think that all of this just crowded me and the, all to familiar, feelings of being over-powered and completely overwhelmed led to the voices.

24HRS WITH... EMMA THOMAS, GENERAL MANAGER OF NATIONAL TRUST SITE: SEATON DELAVAL HALL | NATIONAL TRUST

24 hours with... Emma Thomas, General Manager, Seaton Delaval Hall

Date: 7 August

Why have you chosen to write about today?

It’s the Seaton Delaval Hall staff and volunteer Bake Off today and hopefully a busy day with lots of visitors enjoying the hall and gardens and taking part in our illusion themed week of family activities.



The Bake Off today is the return match, when staff bake, and volunteers judge. At the start of the summer, volunteers baked and staff judged. It’s organised by 1 of our volunteers and always good fun.


Good morning!