- Fight the pressure (campaign tackling sexual pressures)
After showing the documentary on C4 called Sexting Teacher (http://www.channel4.com/programmes/sexting-teacher) I decided it was time for this post...
I think it's a common experience to feel pressured into having sex especially in your High School years.
The part of the 'pressure' that I think is most wrong is that young people who choose not to have sex at that age or particular time in their life, are made to feel abnormal. Children are being bullied for not having sex. The laws are there for a reason; the consenting age is 16 for a reason. And there are laws to protect those who haven't said 'yes' for a reason. I'm a firm believer in the whole 'sex-with-someone-you-love' type of thing and I'm not sure if that's necessarily because of my experiences, my upbringing or just the type of person I am.
I don't remember my Mum sitting me down for the birds and the bees talk. The most in terms of sexual education that I remember was watching a video about periods and putting a condom on a banana. I don't remember ever being talked to about peer pressure and I think the main part they missed in the sex ed lessons was to tell you what to do if someone was being forceful. Or even what it was called; when I began experiencing my 'trauma' I didn't have a clue what was happening to me or even that it had a name.
When I was a child and teenager, there was nothing in the media about people being abused or raped, or at least if there was; I wasn't aware of it. This is where I think my upbringing came into things; I think that these days there is a lot more in the media about negative sexual experiences but there's a lot of inspirational stories too about people being hurt and abused for years and years when they were younger and then eventually reporting it and achieving closure through successful court cases. I think that the change in the media reporting these stories is largely due to the change in public opinion and a growth in confidence in women. It used to be that a girl accusing a man of sexual abuse was called all the names under the sun and quite often, labelled a liar without a proper hearing or investigation. Now, women are a lot more active in fighting for their rights and what they are entitled to; an amazing example of this is the introduction of the Slutwalk; a protest march as a result of a judgemental comment made by one Police Officer.
I think it helped that my Mum always had such a good attitude with relationships in that although her and my Dad were divorced she wasn't going out every night and bringing strange men back. She is a good role model.
Without going into my experiences; I think they further influenced my outlook in that I began to view sex as a means to reproduce and nothing else.
I guess, my point is that lots of things can influence your sex life and views on things but an influence should never be some boys calling you 'frigid' or girls laughing at you for being a virgin. Do not give others so much power over your life. And don't ever regret your decisions where sex is concerned.