Sorry I've just got round to announcing the news; I'm informal!
For those without much mental health lingo knowledge, informal means that I am no longer detained under a section of the Mental Health Act 1983. I'm legally a voluntary patient which basically means more rights. Some service users might not agree and in all fairness on the three occasions I've been informal I would say you have no more rights than a sectioned patient but that was because I was trying to do something dangerous. Being informal still means that if staff think you're struggling they won't let you out. But I'm not. I'm not struggling. I've become informal because I have earned it and I'm better.
I saw my Consultant on Tuesday and we had a little chat, he talked about how things hadn't just gone away now; there will still be hard times. I told him that I knew, but that I wasn't scared of that fact any more. I used to be so terrified of the thought that worse things could happen, that I wanted to die in order to avoid the possibility. I worried things would and could, defeat me. Now I know that it'll pass. You can feel like absolute death but it'll go.
He also asked if I'd made contact with old friends and I told him I had that whilst I've been in hospital my priority has been getting better and my family so I didn't really keep in touch with people from back home. But that's also meant I've been able to decide who mean enough to me to attempt to repair the friendship.
So, now I'm informal, I have made the executive and positive decision to go visit my Chelsea on Sunday! That's what being informal is about; not using it to refuse medication and therapy. Using it as a positive.
Today, I went with my funder to meet my new consultant who will take over when I move up on the 15th. I've already been under his care before so I know he's a good un! He said he could tell I was a lot different and told me I seemed a lot less angry; which is true. Afterwards, my funder and I went to look in on my bungalow and the new flooring is all down and looking lovely! ELEVEN DAYS TO GO!!!