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I’m going to start in a very stereotypical way right now; I cannot believe I’m writing a blog post for I’m NOT Disordered’s TWELTH Birthday! Like, where did the years go?! How did they whiz by so fast that I feel like I barely even noticed them? Yet, at the same time, I remember how very hard I’ve worked and how many amazing opportunities I’ve had/done. Whilst this twelfth Birthday has me feeling quite old, I’m also very grateful for it being a chance to reflect on my blogging career and pick out twelve amazing moments that I feel have really contributed to my blog’s success and my own skills, talents, and experience. You might also notice; the blog has a whole new look and a brand-new logo! This has been in the planning for a while now and a lot of thought has gone into it, so I really hope you all like it…
I’m
NOT Disordered’s First Birthday:
Happy
First Birthday, I'm NOT disordered | I'm NOT Disordered
On
January 6th, 2013, I had a 1:1 with my Key Nurse on the psychiatric
ward I’d been an inpatient of for around six months at that point. In the 1:1,
we talked about ways to more forward and I voiced the feeling that no one could
try to help me because they didn’t even know the half of what had happened to
me and the Nurse agreed. So, knowing that I kept a diary and enjoyed writing,
the Nurse suggested I begin writing about the rape and abuse I experienced when
I was younger, and I agreed that every night I’d take half an hour or so to
write bits down and then I’d give it to the staff. The Nurse also agreed to
write a Care Plan to inform all the staff of what I was doing on an evening so
that if I began struggling even more, they would understand why and have a
better idea of what they could do to help.
Going
back to my hospital room, I found my laptop lying on my bed – the staff had
taken it out of the Security Room whilst I’d been in the 1:1 because we had
only allowed them at a certain time, and they knew I always asked for mine! So,
with the thought in my head that I wanted to document my journey because I felt
that in agreeing to write about the abuse, I had taken a huge step forward to
recovery, – without thought on the pros and cons to blogging nor even
brainstorming the name! – I created I’m NOT Disordered! In creating my blog, I
had the additional thought that another benefit to blogging about my journey,
would be that it would improve my communication with all my loved ones who were
mostly back home and over 100 miles away from the specialist hospital I was a
detained (under section 2 and then – but then, at the point of creating my blog
– section 3 of the 1983 Mental Health Act) inpatient of. I mean, phone calls, texts,
video chats, and leaving likes and comments on social media posts is one thing
but getting to read – in a much more in-depth way – about my actual experiences
in the psychiatric hospital, would (I hoped) bring a far better level of
understanding and empathy to the support they already unconditionally provided
me.
Creating I’m NOT Disordered on a whim and as such a spontaneous action, with no real efforts to plan and prepare, I didn’t have any remote sense of expectation; yet, when the blog made it to it’s first Birthday on January 6th, 2014, I was actually, genuinely surprised! And I think that this was mostly due to the fact that when I started blogging and would talk about it with people, so many of them were incredibly sceptical that I would continue with it and that I’d actually maintain it and remain consistent in the frequency of the blog posts being published. I remember one spiteful, jealous person said; “your blog is going nowhere!” Looking at the entire situation now – the position my blog is in and the situation that person is in – I can’t help but think, ‘it went further than you!’ There was also one point where the hospital’s OT staff actually sat me down and told me that I was a very uncommitted person, that I would sign up for activity groups but as soon as they started and things were going well with them, I would back out or quit. And I think that actually ended up proving to be motivational and encouraging because I wanted to prove them wrong – or at least prove that I wasn’t like that with this. That this, was different. Blogging was different.
My
First Event
Today,
I volunteered at... | I'm NOT Disordered
After
being asked to write an article for Time To Change’s website, I found myself
volunteering to help their staff and other volunteers at an event in a city
(Leeds) near the psychiatric hospital. I remember being in a Ward Round which
we had every so often where the Consultant Psychiatrist, his Deputy, the OT
staff, a Ward Nurse, Therapy… everyone attended to discuss you and for once, we
were actually allowed to attend and hear what was being planned about our care!
Anyway, in this one before the event, the staff were talking about how
difficult it was going to be get staff to accompany me to both the event
training and then the actual event and the Consultant Psychiatrist said; “this
is what we’re aiming for though!” He explained that there was no point
encouraging recovery if they couldn’t help and support someone actually making
moves into their recovery! And of course, he was right, and he was in
charge(!), so everyone recognised those two qualities and before I knew it,
everything was scheduled and planned!
I
developed the notion that Time To Change as an organisation and one of their
staff who was in charge of the event – Angela (who I’m actually still Facebook
friends with!) – were the first to ever really trust in both my own skills and
in my blog’s potential. They were also so understanding about my mental health.
Due to me being detained under that section 3, the Psychiatrist ordered that I
be accompanied at both the event training and the actual event so I’d had to
tell the organiser staff that I was an inpatient and on leave so that she knew
the staff accompanying me didn’t really need to participate in the training or
the event, she could just sit on the sidelines. It turned out, however, that
the staff they assigned on the day was young and we got along so well that she
wanted to join in! So that was good because whilst I was appreciative of the
staff knowing my situation, I was worried about all the other people doing the
training and volunteering at the event and I was thinking they’d be wondering
what was going on with me having this person with me who was just sat there!
Something
else that I always think about when remembering this first event I attended, is
how far I’ve come in terms of my duties and responsibilities at events! I mean,
at this Time To Change one in Leeds, I was literally just handing out leaflets
and encouraging members of the public to go see the actual stall to get more
information on the organisation! They had some facepainting too so whilst
people were queuing for that all the volunteers were going through them talking
about mental health. There was also this big board (it’s in a picture on the
blog post) that read ‘I pledge…’ and then you had to fill it in with what you
promised to do around mental health or supporting someone, so I was going
around encouraging people to fill that in too.
I wrote
in the blog post that I felt really proud throughout the event but that it was
especially true when there was a young girl holding the pledge board. It made
me realise and think about the fact that whilst you want everyone in the
general public to adopt a better attitude towards mental health, it’s always
good to aim things at the younger generation because they’re the ones who are really
going to go on to make the biggest changes for society. And whilst I was so
proud that I’d helped that girl to write her pledge, I’m even prouder from the
knowledge and fact that I mentioned before; that I’ve really moved on and
improved with my duties and responsibilities at events. Like, with Time To
Change in particular, I went from handing out leaflets to making the closing
speech at a big event (which I’m actually going to talk about later) to one
year them having me in London, monitoring their social media feed, and creating
content throughout the entirety of Time To Talk Day! That was a huge
responsibility because it could have really impacted their reputation and it
actually did because from the content I produced, they earned another one
hundred or so followers! Whilst that’s obviously so good for the organisation,
it’s also really good for my career experience! In it not only helping me with
future, similar work; but also working as encouragement for other organisations
to have me volunteer for them too because they can see the benefits, I can
bring to them.
Ending
I’m NOT Disordered
The
End of I'm NOT Disordered | I'm NOT Disordered
If
you’ve read, I’m NOT Disordered for a while, you’ll have likely been expecting
this one to pop up on my list of career moments. I still think it sounds ironic
to say that ending I’m NOT Disordered in September 2014 was honestly the
greatest thing I’ve ever done for my blog and my blogging career on a whole.
The
process and journey to the end of it actually started a little before September
when I wrote a blog post which included a bit of a rant about the staff in the
psychiatric hospital. I received a comment saying that I was an ungrateful
*swear word! * and that they were only trying to help, and I was just looking
for attention. I tried to power through, and I think I was able to for a few
reasons, but the main one was that I’d heard it all before! The bit about
attention. The number of times I was called an ‘attention-seeker’ by both my
local Police force and my local Crisis Team in the three years proceeding my
admission to the specialist psychiatric hospital, was incredibly high. I mean,
it was enough to become an entirely new reason to feel hopeless, sad, and
suicidal! It made asking for help so much more difficult because I felt this
horrible concern that you should never experience – that if I were to call the
Crisis Team, they had every chance of making it even worse. This should never
be a valid worry for a mental health service user. You should never be afraid
that a professional is only going to add to your struggle when, by every
definition, they should only be making things better. Making you safer.
The
other part of that comment on my blog post – the bit about being ungrateful –
also didn’t have a huge impact but for a different reason. It was because I
understood why that person would think that of me. Of course, I knew that I wasn’t
always full of appreciation and respect for the staff in the psychiatric
hospital, but that nature or attitude of being ‘ungrateful’ was typically only
really prominent when I was suicidal. On one occasion, I was given unescorted
leave in the grounds of the hospital, and I managed to escape after hopping
over three fences. I made a suicide attempt in another city and when the Police
found me, I was taken to the medical hospital where the hospital staff arrived.
After refusing the lifesaving medical treatment, I was restrained, sedated, and
placed on life support.
When I
was brought out of the coma, I think that – in all honesty – gratitude was the
absolute last feeling on my mind when I thought about how I felt and what I
thought of the staff. I hated them for it. I really did. I resented them for
saving me. I felt like they were making me suffer. That, in saving my life,
they were saying that I didn’t deserve the peace that death would allow me. They
were saying I should go through all the hardships I was experiencing. So, yeah;
ungrateful would cover that! But, in regular moments on the ward – like when
the staff made mistakes or failures – I wouldn’t say I was ungrateful for them;
but I did always feel there was inequality in that if we (the inpatients) made
mistakes, we were reprimanded and received consequences. So, in my opinion, me
calling out their mistakes on my blog, was like me saying that they should own
up to their errors too because honestly? Nine times out of ten, they absolutely
didn’t. They didn’t apologise or admit to it. And they would create ward rules
which were hard for us, but fine for them because they were only on the ward to
complete their shift – they didn’t live there and have to deal with the
consequences of new rules literally 24/7! And that actually became similar to
my opinion of the person who left the comment – if she wasn’t living my life
and on the same ward all this time, how could she voice those things?
Fortunately,
I was very far along in my recovery by the time I received this comment too so
that proved to be a huge reason why it didn’t impact me too much. Or at least,
it didn’t to the degree of making me unsafe. With my recovery in mind though,
it meant that my discharge from the hospital – after two and a half years – was
finally planned and scheduled for the second week of September. So, on September
8th, I published a post (you can read it here) asking what people thought of
the idea of me ending I’m NOT Disordered on the basis that it was like closing
this chapter of my life. I kind of liked the idea of putting it all behind me.
Whilst
those considerations were happening, I still published a piece for World
Suicide Prevention Day (which you can read here) and decided to open up about
the three attempts I had made. I received a comment from another anonymous (the
ultimate sign of cowardness in my opinion) account wishing me ‘luck with number
four.’ And it was like one of those ‘straw-that-broke-the-camels-back’ moments
where a few things had happened that made me consider ending I’m NOT Disordered
but I’d still remained unsure until this. This was the ‘straw’ – the straw that
broke I’m NOT Disordered! So, two days after that comment, I published the post
at the beginning of this part, which announced that I was closing my blog down.
In the post, I voiced the recognition that I’d made myself vulnerable to
comments like this because I was being so open and honest about my mental
health, but I stated that I felt I didn’t receive enough benefits from blogging
to make dealing with the comments worthwhile.
I went
through the process of my discharge from the psychiatric hospital and transfer
to a rehabilitation unit where each person had their own bungalow and the staff
had one there too so there was support available 24/7, but you were also more
independent. It was the perfect way to acclimate from being in hospital for so
long, to being in the community in my own home. And I in the unit, I began
missing my blogging. I missed having somewhere to go when things happened –
having that outlet for my thoughts and feelings. I also hated the idea that I’d
essentially ‘given in’ to those horrible comments from those two awful people.
That they’d won. And combining those two elements, saw me publish a new piece
on October 29th (which you can read here) where I opened the blog back
up and explained those two reasons for doing so. I received so many lovely
comments on my social media, that I’ve just never looked back!
I’d say
that making that decision that I wouldn’t ever blog again helped me to, in my
opinion, become a much stronger blogger than I had been before. I think it’s
given me a greater sense of purpose, determination, and dedication too because
I’ve seen what life was like without I’m NOT Disordered. And I didn’t like it!
My
First Media Appearance
I'm
NOT Disordered Is In The Evening Chronicle | I'm NOT Disordered
Just a
few months after opening I’m NOT Disordered back up it was on around 60,000
readers and I decided to write my very first press release and send it to my
local newspaper: The Evening Chronicle. I think it’s a completely amazing
example of how things in life can completely turn on their head – that I could
go from quitting and closing it down, to basically wanting everyone in the
world to know my blog existed! But it wasn’t just about that; I also wanted to
spread the word of my recovery in the hope that it would fill others with hope
and encouragement… The Chronicle used this one instance I’d told the Journalist
about which I touched on earlier about when I went AWOL from the hospital and
was put on life support. Well, before they put me on it, they tried to just
give me a mild sedation and put a cannula in my foot to administer the medical
treatment to counteract my suicide attempt. And since I was being restrained, I
used the toes of my other foot to pull the cannula out. The Journalist used
that as an example of just how terrible and low things got. A way to illustrate
the gravity of my comeback. The level of strength, determination, and
dedication it took to overcome feeling that hopeless and suicidal.
One
little behind-the-scenes ditty I like to tell people about appearing in the
newspaper was around the photoshoot I had to have with the Chronicle’s
Photographer. He had me go out the front of my home to do some photos and my
house is on a footpath that runs through some grass and so the homes opposite
are literally just on the other side of the grass because we have no
front-gardens. Also, I live in a bungalow surrounded by bungalows that are
stereotypically correct in housing elderly people, so the amount of curtain
twitches I saw with my neighbours watching my photoshoot was so embarrassing!
And when the Photographer was telling me to pull my hood up slightly in this
one particular pose, I felt like cringing! Then, another funny one was in my
Kitchen when they had me pick up this empty mug and stand at the kitchen sink
and he asked me to “just look off into the distance and try to look
thoughtful.” I struggled so much to keep my laughter in with that one!
Ultimately,
I enjoyed the media appearance, and it did wonders for my blog’s reputation and
popularity, so I’ve engaged in a lot more since then – the two most notable
being on ITV Tyne Tees News and the BBC ‘News at 10pm’ Show.
The ITV
appearance (which you can read about here) was created by an email from
my local NHS mental health Trust who I’d collaborated with a few times and had
developed a bond and connection with their Chief Executive. They said that
statistics showed an increase in young people being admitted to hospital for
self-harm and asked if I would be interviewed by ITV for them to run a piece –
which was also going to include interviews with professionals from the Trust
too – about this new statistic.
Now,
whilst I found the actual filming for it in my home, ok; I really didn’t like
the end result that was shown on the TV for millions to see! Mostly because
they had ended up taking a clip from a video, I’d posted on YouTube about
hearing voices and no one had even remotely mentioned never mind asked me, if
they could show that. I appreciate it was already in public domain, but it felt
a bit disrespectful to have not even told me they were going to use it. It also
then received a ton of comments from people saying my voice-hearing (which was
a result of trauma and not actual psychosis as was mentioned at the time)
ingenuine. But, in all honesty, it wasn’t completely about the content of the
video; it was also the fact that I’ve always said; I’m not a Vlogger or a
YouTuber! Like, filming and editing videos is certainly not where my talent and
skills lie. Although, in all honesty, I have previously enjoyed doing those
things and that’s why I have; but I’ve always recognised that I’m in no way
good at doing it.
My
second most notable media appearance was BBC ‘News at Ten’ (which you can read
about here) which came about after
collaborating with the private healthcare company who owned the specialist
hospital I was in for those two and a half years. This time, the appearance was
negated by the release of guidelines that Facebook use when content is reported
to them and whilst they were no numerous subjects like terrorism and threats of
violence, the BBC were focusing on those guidelines around reports related to
mental health, self-harm, and suicide. Prior to filming, I had a long
conversation over the phone with a lovely Producer called Liz (who you can
follow on Twitter here) who I think was trying to
ensure that I had plenty to say and that my opinions were valid and not too
controversial or disagreeable. Once that was certain, she had another Producer
and Cameraman come to my home to film my interview and do some ‘B roll’ (those
clips of people walking or doing things that get slotting in with their voice
or the voice of the presenter/interviewer etc continuing over the top) – which
ended up mostly being of me playing with the cat I had at the time!
Anyway,
that was a much better experience because I enjoyed talking about the topic I
was being asked about – I’d been blogging for four years by this point, so I’d
developed a lot of thoughts and experience around social media and obviously
posting mental health related content on it. So, I held back on some occasions
in my interview because I actually had so much more to say but we had to be
quick so that it could be included in the BBC News that same night!
Whilst
neither of these appearances were centred around, I’m NOT Disordered, and
actually, neither of them mentioned my blogging, I guess people might have
googled my name and came across it because the views still escalated. It was
also a really good experience in terms of building some confidence around
featuring in the media – which genuinely proved really useful for my appearance
on Channel 4 Show; Dispatches (which you can read about here).
The
First Event I Was Asked To Blog At
Mental
Health 2015 Event | 'Ad' | I'm NOT Disordered
This huge
career moment came about when I was randomly invited to this event on Facebook
and ended up contacting the organiser of the entire thing, Danny Bowman. When
we talked about my blog, he asked if I would attend the event as the Blogger of
it – we’d also agreed for me to video it, but my camera malfunctioned and I
ended up with zero footage and just my notes and photos to rely on for the
content.
Now, I chose
this as a big career moment because it – like the media appearances – was
really confidence-building. It really helped reassure me too. Reassure me that
I was doing the right thing with this whole blogging malarkey! I mean, after
closing it down for a lengthy (in the grand scheme of the blogging industry,
least) and re-opening, I think it’s quite understandable that I would go on to
still question my decision and doubt my abilities and skills to even be a
blogger. Like, despite my dedication and determination leading to me starting
I’m NOT Disordered back up again, that doesn’t mean to say that I would always
hold it, constantly, for the rest of my now twelve-year-long career! Of course,
I have moments of doubt but being asked by a very smart, intelligent, and knowledgeable
person to blog about a very fancy (it was in such a posh hotel in Newcastle!)
event, felt like evidence that I was good at what I do.
I think
that my lack of confidence in my abilities doesn’t just stem from the horrible
comments on my blog, but also from my High School Textiles teacher who
consistently criticised – and not in a constructive way; because that’s
something I really appreciate and thrive on – my work. I mean, no matter what I
did – like, if I took an assignment literally then there was something wrong.
If I went more creative about the task, then it was wrong. I was absolutely
shocked and very taken aback when I actually passed (with a C) my GCSE Textiles
exam just because by the end of the course I felt really defeated and
questioned the quality and standard of my work. I thought that my teacher’s
opinion was everyone’s opinion, and it isn’t. And that’s a difficult lesson to
learn when you’re 16 and your teachers are some of the most important and
influential people in your life. You’re led to believe that they know what
they’re talking about. That they’re always right. So, to find that the external
examiners actually liked my work had two impacts:
1.
It
was obviously very lovely, and a confidence boost and I questioned going into a
career in the fashion industry – not designing but I did consider Visual
Merchandising for a long time.
2.
It
was also saddening that my teacher had put me through two years of ridicule
when all her words were actually just based on her own, individual, opinions.
They weren’t ‘right.’
I felt
very fortunate to pass my Textiles GCSE (I passed all nine of them actually –
with two B’s and the rest C’s!) because I think if I hadn’t, I’d have been left
a very self-conscious, uncertain, timid, and unassertive person. I wouldn’t be
me. That’s how belittled that teacher had left me feeling. Like, if I think
back to that person I became, I think I’d have laughed in your face if you’d
told me that I’d almost two million followers by this point in my life! Well,
I’d have done that for a long time after that too! Isn’t it strange and kind of
scary to think that if someone else – like those examiners – had made a
different decision – like failing me – about your life, you wouldn’t be who you
are today? Kind of surreal, when you think about it. And daunting. But this is
why people preach about being kind to others and showing empathy – especially
around mental health – because you have no idea how influential your response
or treatment of someone else will impact their life.
Alongside
it being confidence-building, another aspect of blogging at an event which I
learnt from this instance, was the power and the opportunities of networking at
events. In building my confidence, it left me happy and content enough to
approach complete strangers – including a political speaker! – to talk about
not just their experiences and their speeches, but to also share details of my
blogging career and to talk about I’m NOT Disordered specifically. At that
event, speaking to people about my blog, left me feeling energised and
productive, and it filled me with more determination in a sense that I found
myself wanting to make myself and my blog worthy of having more people talk about
it and read about it. I wanted to build on my knowledge and understanding of
this industry and I actually began doing online learning through Future Learn
and the Centre of Excellence with some of my qualifications including a Diploma
in Fundraising, Internet Marketing Strategies for Business Diploma, and a
Certificate in Digital Wellbeing! I wanted to be deserving of this increasing
attention.
Aside
from plugging my blog though, something else that I’ve benefited from in
networking is finding inspiration in others. The variety of stories you hear at
mental health events in particular is incredible. It’s humbling really, to hear
the journeys of others and it’s something which questions a person’s
appreciation of things. I’ve become someone who believes that you should never
make comparisons to someone’s life where the comparison is to a degree that it
belittles your own experiences e.g. when you’ve gone through a loss but hear of
someone losing a more immediate member of their family. I always think you have
to remember that the hardest thing you’ve ever gone through in your life is the
hardest thing for you. Don’t ever think ‘well such and such went through that,
so I have no right to be sad!’ You could, however, use other people’s
experiences to bring light to your own in finding hope by considering what
they’ve been through as incredibly hard, but recognising that they were still
able to overcome it and so there’s every chance that you can overcome your own
hardships too.
100,000
Readers
Thank
You for 100k | I'm NOT Disordered
10
Tips To Get Over 100,000 Readers | I'm NOT Disordered
So...
I'm throwing a party!! #100kwithimnotdisordered | I'm NOT Disordered
#100kwithimnotdisordered
| I'm NOT Disordered
Similarly
to ending my blog, if you’ve read, I’m NOT Disordered for a while, you’ll
likely have expected this one to crop up at some point in this post too!
Whilst
I obviously appreciate every single reader I gain and celebrate every single
milestone there is, I think that 100,000 was definitely the first big
milestone! Saying that, however, I do actually remember when I first created,
I’m NOT Disordered, and I was still in the psychiatric hospital and there was
this other inpatient who I was really close to. She was quite good with computers,
so she actually did the entire design of my blog – including the logo – for the
first few months (it was one reason why I was a mess when she was discharged
before me was because it meant I’d have to learn how to do it all for myself!).
And one evening, the reader count went to 100 and I remember rushing from my
room and getting half way down the corridor to her room just two doors down,
and she was there, and we were screaming and hugging. She’d obviously been on
my blog at the exact same time and had saw it reach that number too! And I just
remember hearing a ton of alarms and shouting and the staff were all running
towards us because they thought we were fighting! That’s how loud we were
screaming!
When I
saw my blog was heading towards 100,000 readers, I decided I wanted to host my
first event to celebrate and I began scoping locations – two large hotels in
Newcastle were first on the list and I ended up booking an event suite and a
room for the night of the event at the second one I visited: the Royal
Station Hotel. Due
to the nature of the event (it being around mental health) and the publicity
the Hotel would earn from being on my blog, I was given a really good price for
the room and catering and I ended up hiring a really amazing busker/singer/guitarist
I’d heard one time on Northumberland Street in Newcastle for the night! I also
had an adjoining room to the main one where I had some organisations and
charities – including the staff from Time To Change who’d organised that first
event I’d volunteered at back in 2014! – set up stalls with merchandise and information
on their cause and the work they did. I also had my cousin as the Photographer,
and she brought a photobooth style background with accessories and fancy dress
items for people to hold up for funny photos together. And! I put together gift
bags with little bits and pieces and a few marketing materials with my blog’s
logo and link on! Fortunately, the room was so big, I didn’t have to really
decorate it; I had a few paper flowers and things dotted around and we
decorated the tablets with purple petals because my logo back then was purple
and I had place cards with little purple bows on for the ‘top table’ and party
poppers on every seat for the end of my speech when I read out the exact total
of readers at that moment!
I had some amazing particular moments at the party – which I listed and wrote about in one of the blog posts linked above, but one of them was something which I guess wasn’t exactly a moment but more like a huge bonus to the event. And it was seeing all the most special, influential, and important people in my life meeting each other and spending time together! Like, there were people and organisations there who I’d worked with in collaborating on blog posts and social media content but who didn’t know each other. And my Mum got to meet some of my newest friends I’d met at events, and she met everyone I’d been working with. And my best-friends spent time together because each of them is so different that I was the only common thread between all of us – they weren’t all from one friendship group – so that was really lovely too!
Then a really particular moment I remember was at the very end of the event when almost everyone had gone, and I hadn’t even realised because I was too busy on the dance floor with two of my best-friends dancing and singing to The Killers song, Mr Brightside! That song will now forever have a special place in my heart! It was ironic because for the two and a half years that I was learning Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) as an inpatient in the psychiatric hospital, I absolutely hated the module and exercises on ‘Mindfulness’ the most! I thought that if I was mindful and concentrated on being ‘in the moment’ and feeling all my feelings and thinking all my thoughts, I’d be even more suicidal than I was when I was trying to block everything out! But in that moment on the dance floor, I just let myself be there! I soaked in all the happiness and excitement and the pride that I’d created this entire event and that I was solely responsible for the entire reason for the event! I’d achieved over 100,000 readers on my little blog and here I was – alive(!) – and with the people I loved the most. I honestly couldn’t imagine feeling more grateful and content.
My
First Big Speech
Story
Camp with Time To Change | 'Ad' | I'm NOT Disordered
In
September 2015, after over one year of working with Time To Change on my blog,
I was asked to be a Consultant on their Story Camp event in London and then;
after giving my thoughts, feelings, and opinions on every planning stage of it,
the Digital Team asked me to give the closing speech at the event. I honestly
couldn’t believe it, but I tried to act like it was an everyday request so that
I didn’t look unprofessional with how excitable and equally really nervous I
was!
Despite
my nerves and sheer anxiety at just the thought of doing the speech, I still
said that I would do it because I recognised that it was a hugely beneficial
opportunity for me. I mean, I knew doing it would help my confidence and make
me more willing to do something like that again, the event in general would be
a great networking opportunity, and it would be a good chance to talk about I’m
NOT Disordered to some of the very important people who were apparently going
to be there. I looked at it as though, if I wanted my blog to continue to
improve and increase in popularity – if I wanted to continue over 100,000
readers, I might be asked to give speeches in the future too and if I said no
to this one… Well, then I’d only be asked again later down the line, and it
might be even harder to say yes when I’ve declined this time.
When I
arrived in London the day before the event, I immediately felt a sense of being
‘at home.’ I absolutely loved London… Until I was round the corner from a
terrorist attack a number of years ago! But prior to that, I had actually been
looking at flat prices and considering the practicalities of the idea of moving
all my things there as well as the cat I had at the time! But I was literally
so close to the terrorist attack that people were being evacuated into the
building I was in for an event. There were Police and helicopters everywhere
and we just raced into our taxi that was fortunately just pulling up and headed
to Kings Cross – a different way but we got there safely, and I immediately
told my Mum I was fine in case she saw something on the News because she knew
where I was. It was really scary, and I recognise that attacks like that will
happen wherever those people want them to (as you’ll see in a little bit), but
London is very obviously a prime target. So, bang went the idea of moving
there!
My
hotel for the Story Camp event was actually a lovely little one and my third
storey room had a window looking right out onto Kings Cross – it was quite
amazing! Then the event was in the Free Word Centre, and I remember when the
lady came onto the stage to give the opening speech, and I realised I actually
recognised her from the News! She was the Director of Time To Change; Sue Baker
and we ended up getting to meet in the break and it was lovely to see how
down-to-earth she was despite her notability! She was also really encouraging
and supportive of my blog and said she’d actually heard of me because of the
work I’d been doing with the organisation’s Digital Team so that was quite
amazing too! To think someone like her had heard of little old me! And it’s
actually a comment I’ve heard a lot recently with my work for the charity
Waythrough and it genuinely doesn’t get any less startling or surreal to think
important people have heard your name mentioned. To just think my name is being
mentioned in meetings and conferences and events and things is quite a strange
concept despite being in the media and having as many readers as I’m NOT
Disordered now has! Like, you’d think that because of those things, I’d be
accustomed to the idea of being talked about by those who I might have never
met, but it’s genuinely still a strange concept for me!
At
Story Camp, I was in this sort of foyer with other people who were attending
and when people were walking in, they were immediately recognising each other
and talking. And I didn’t know anyone. So, almost in tears, I rang my Mum! I told
her I didn’t want to do it any more and I wanted to be at home. I told her that
I didn’t know anyone, and everyone seemed to know others and were all talking
to each other and I was literally just stood by myself in a corner! She told me
I could do it. She told me I was capable of doing this speech and that I’d
regret it if I didn’t. She reassured me that I’d end up enjoying it and that at
the end, I’d wonder what I’d been so bothered and upset about. It was weird, I
feel like I said all those things to myself but for some special reason, it
meant something different – something more – coming from my Mum. It – strangely
– made it more believable than anything I could have ever said to myself.
Sadly,
I don’t remember what I actually said in my speech, but I remember being so
grateful that it was in an auditorium because it meant that on the stage –
where I had to stand – there was actually a lectern, so I was able to balance
my iPad, which had all the notes on for the speech, on that. The reason I was
relieved was because I had been worried that everyone would see my hands
shaking if I had to stand up there holding my iPad! Also luckily, I had ended
up talking to someone who said she’d met me at another event, and she took some
photos and video of me making my speech so that I could show my Mum. And that
was a lovely idea because I honestly don’t think I would have done it without
her advice, support, love, and unconditional encouragement.
The Post I Got The Greatest Feedback From
You
CAN Get Through Reporting Your Trauma | I'm NOT Disordered
Since
this post almost eight years ago, the feedback I got in an email after
publishing it has actually come up in conversation a number of times for the
very reason that it’s honestly the greatest, most motivational, and most
influential – and therefore most memorable – that I’ve literally ever had in
all twelve years! And I really don’t mean for that to downplay other amazing
comments and feedback I’ve received on my posts and my social media content,
because they all mean a great deal to me, and they’ve all influenced my content
in one way or another. It’s like I said earlier, I actually really thrive off
constructive criticism so even comments along those lines – of which I’ve had
zero! – would be appreciated and respected. I think that no matter how many
things happen in your life that you’re grateful for, there’s always going to be
something that just… Tips the scales! Something which really stands out the
most and which really does end up changing your life. This was that ‘something’
for my blogging career.
I
remember wanting to do this post a little bit differently in using the bold,
italics, and underline functions in Word throughout the post. I wanted a bit of
a different aesthetic consistently too – not just in the text – so I ‘recruited’
my partner at the time, who loved taking photographs, and we went to Meggie’s
Burn Reservoir in my hometown of Blyth in Northumberland. I really enjoyed
having my ex take photos for my blog because it was reminiscent of my ultimate blogging
idol; Victoria Magrath, whose husband, Alex; also takes a lot of the
photographs on her blog: www.inthefrow.com and throughout both her social
media content and her YouTube channel. It felt very cool, and trendy and I really
liked that it sort of showed he was supportive of my blogging to the point
where he was actually helping me with it and participating in it himself. I did
actually buy a URL for him to have his own photography website, but I realised
I was making him into something he wasn’t. I was wanting him to be more
ambitious and productive than he actually was. So, when we split up; one of the
first things I did was cancel the direct debit to that URL!
Anyway,
the new aesthetic and the photographs gave me a sense of confidence that I
desperately needed in writing a blog post with this theme or angle. I mean, to
talk about getting through reporting sexual abuse is quite a heavy topic and a
really thought-provoking one too. I think that it’s one where whether you have
any experience or not around it, it’s still a hard blog post to read. Still a
challenging one to cope with the thoughts and feelings it might influence or
cause you to experience. And I was aware of this, so I actually put a trigger
warning at the beginning of the blog post – something which I rarely do because
I often have the thought that my titles make it quite obvious what the content
will be and that’s for the reader to then determine whether that would be
triggering.
A
little while after publishing this piece (it’ll become clear why I was a while
later), I received an email from a name I hadn’t heard of – and the lady has
asked to remain anonymous, so I won’t disclose it – but it showed her entire
name and not just a random email address and had the entire blog post title
quoted in the ‘subject’ box, so I figured it was going to be a genuine piece of
feedback. And, as I always do with those which seem genuine, I opened the email.
She started the email with a bit of a vague introduction of her name, where
she’s from, what she did for a living and then how she came about my blog – her
Community Psychiatric Nurse (CPN) had told her about it because she’d just been
given the same diagnosis, I’d had of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Now,
after three years of blogging, this (a reader just being diagnosed with BPD and
having my blog recommended to them) actually wasn’t a new thing to hear in my
emails or comments on blog posts. The second thing she said – very sadly –
wasn’t new either; that she’d experienced rape and abuse too. She told me who
was guilty and said that – like me – for so many reasons she hadn’t reported it
at the time, but that upon reading this blog post, she’d finally gone to the
Police.
I
honestly couldn’t believe what I was reading. I was literally speechless. Like,
just thinking; ‘oh my God! Look at what my blog has done!’ The incredible
influence and power my words in this blog post had on this lady was absolutely
shocking and baffling! I felt lucky, to be honest. And I sceptical of God, but I
truly felt blessed by this. Blessed that I had this ability. The ability to
have encouraged and supported someone to decide to report a crime. A trauma. She
reported her trauma. And the email just continued to make me speechless! The
lady went on to say that – and this is why I didn’t receive this email for a
while after the post was actually published – her abuser/rapist was arrested
and upon being questioned, admitted his guilt! After appearing in Court, he was
imprisoned for a minimum of twenty years before the possibility of parole! So
many thoughts and feelings went through me when I read that! Of course, the
main one was joy and happiness for the lady, but there was also, sadly, a sense
of frustration that her rapist admitted to his actions and mine hadn’t. That
she’d achieved some sense of justice, and I had not even the remotest sense of
justice!
Fortunately,
the stage I was in with my mental health recovery meant that those thoughts and
feelings around the frustration and sadness from drawing comparisons, didn’t
massively impact me and that they certainly didn’t impact my safety. And so,
because of this, all I really draw from this email and this feedback was
positive. Amazing positivity! Like, how incredible a thought is it that your
work could have such a power and influence over the life – or lives – of those
it interacts with? And what were the chances that she was referred to my blog
when I published that post? What if she’d gone to it weeks later and that post
was back in the archive, and she didn’t bother to scroll back? Or what if she’d
looked at, I’m NOT Disordered weeks earlier and wasn’t too fussed and stopped
following the posts? Just the chance, the timing, it’s special. It’s right. My
Nana always said that everything happens for a reason and hopefully, with her
rapist/abuser being imprisoned, that’s also saved a lot of other people from falling
under his power, control, and manipulation, and suffering from and experiencing
his criminal behaviours.
A
Time I Felt Really Helpful
IN
PARTNERSHIP WITH GREATER MANCHESTER MENTAL HEALTH NHS FOUNDATION TRUST | Ad |
I'm NOT Disordered
I
mentioned earlier about being around the corner from a terrorist attack in
London and I explained my recognition that if those people who were guilty of
these things wanted to do them, they’d do them anywhere… Well, this is the
content that really taught me that.
On
Monday 22nd May 2017, there was a terrorist attack via a bomb at an
Ariana Grande concert in Manchester. Within days, the Manchester Mental Health
NHS Foundation Trust contacted me saying that they’d seen the content I’ve
published around trauma. They told me there’d been a huge increase in the
number of referrals of young people after the attack and asked if I could
produce content – in collaboration with them – specifically aimed at those
people. I was very honoured for them reaching out to me and I’m NOT Disordered
and that they even created a graphic with both our logos on it! It showed a
tremendous amount of dedication to working together right off the bat. And of
course, with the cause in mind too obviously, I said yes to the collaboration.
Initially
– in the first blog post linked above – I published their images on the topic
of ‘Common Reactions to Traumatic Events’ which included graphics titled ‘How
Can Children Be Helped to Cope?’ and ‘When Should People Seek More Help?’ with
simple text and featuring bullet points and stereotypical illustrations. But
this felt like a very simple gesture and left me with the notion that I’d
really done the bare minimum in support of their work and the cause they’d
contacted me regarding. So, I decided to actually write a blog post myself
which was the second one linked above that was a bit brief but which I used to
express the message that it was ‘ok’ to deem a trauma to have taken over your
life. Then, in mentioning asking for help, I also said it was normal to feel
embarrassed to have to ask for some sort of help and support because, as I said
in the post, it can feel like you’re admitting that the way you’ve been coping
with the trauma isn’t working any more or isn’t good enough.
My
third post in this collaboration was a bit lengthier and more detailed with me
covering my three top tips to coping with trauma: being more open about it,
removing yourself from a triggering situation, and ‘gritting your teeth and
seeing it through.’ For each tip, I talked through at least three pros and cons
to them in a bid to illustrate that there can always be benefits and negative
or difficult consequences to varied methods of coping with traumatic
experiences. All in the hope that it would instil in a reader’s insight the
fact that there isn’t always a ‘right’ way of coping because a method that one
person might find more beneficial can be something that the next person finds
too difficult. I finished up the post with a graphic from Manchester’s site
with contact details for people in the Manchester locality because I recognised
that I had no clue who to refer someone to in a totally different area and
postcode to me! I also really recognise that my and my blog aren’t necessarily
the best ones to come to for advice and support; I’m in no way trained or
qualified to provide any sort of Therapy – just a listening ear and stories of similar
experiences and ways I got through them.
I chose
this collaboration as a time I felt most helpful in my blogging career because
it felt like a massive deal for an NHS Trust to approach me to provide help
around such a huge incident. I mean, it was obviously all over the news and then
Ariana Grande did a charity concert afterwards (around the time of the second
blog post) with a ton of huge artists performing alongside her and providing
free tickets to all those who had been at the original concert. So, I
recognised what a widely known and massively publicised issue I was being asked
to become involved in. And the fact that they had contacted me really showed –
to me, at least – that my blog was making moves in NHS Trusts across the
Country and not just my own locality. Which was exactly what I wanted for my
content to do – to reach those professionals, because I recognise that they’re
some of the greatest and better placed people to spread the word to those who
will more greatly benefit from my content. They’re the people that those with a
mental health problem are going to for help and support, so any advice they
provide is typically heard and tried. It’s another example of why I’ve always
believed that word-of-mouth publicity is the best kind and is, in my opinion,
the form that is most largely responsible for my blog’s popularity.
But it
wasn’t just about me feeling touched and privileged to be asked to help, the
evidence of my blog helping was shown after that third collaboration blog post
when the Trust got in touch to tell me that out of the 70+% increase of young
people being referred, at least 85% had mentioned reading these blog posts and stated
they’d found them beneficial in ways that really differed between each
individual. Which is exactly what my thought process had been; especially, as I
said, in that third blog post when I’d talked about how each coping skill had
pros and cons that would be weighed up and considered in differently overpowering
and influential ways for each individual person. The idea that my blog posts
have helped so many young people, is also something which reminds me of the
fact that I honestly wish – and this might sound vain but here we go – there’d
been a blog like I’m NOT Disordered around when I was at my most unwell with my
mental health and in the most immediate aftermath of my trauma. I think that if
I’d been able to read about someone else going through something remotely
similar to my own experiences, I’d have felt so much less alone, and that
loneliness was a huge precipitator to my self-harm and of the general
deterioration of my mental health. So, I recognise the power that my content
has, and I hope that in having the ability to do that – to know my influence –
I don’t abuse or ignore that. I use it to help me to create genuinely helpful
content.
To all
those young people, well done! You made it!
Joining
The Top UK BPD Blogs List
TOP
10 UK BLOGS ON BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER | I'm NOT Disordered
If you
follow me on social media (@aimes_wilson on both Twitter and Instagram), you’d
have likely known this one was going to crop up at some point too! On New
Year’s Day this year, I posted a screenshot from the ‘memories’ function on
Facebook where, on New Years Eve 2023 I’d posted a screenshot of my blog being
number one in the Top UK BPD Blogs list with the caption: ‘ending the year on a
career high.’ So, I took another screenshot of the list this year with the new
date of 2025 and posted them alongside each other with the caption: ‘kept my
spot all year!’
I’d
actually forgotten that when I first joined the list it was Top 10 (it’s now
Top 5) and I’m also gutted that I can’t remember what position I was in on the
list when I first got onto it, because I didn’t screenshot it or mention it in
the blog post I linked above! But, regardless of the exact position, I know it
wasn’t number one because one thing I know for definite is that I’ve definitely
had to work my way up the list over the seven years since I joined it! And
that’s what makes this one of the biggest career moments – the fact that whilst
I was definitely working hard on my blog back in 2018 when I joined the list, I
think it’d be absolutely fair to say that it wasn’t anywhere as hard as I work
these days. I think though, that this was because I didn’t take it too
seriously or deem it a career really until this moment of reaching a place on
that list. It was a kick up the bum and something that showed me that actually,
I’m NOT Disordered was a pretty important deal and something which deserved
having a lot of effort put into it because it was now being recognised as a
‘top blog’ in the UK.
When I
first discovered my blog had joined this fairly prestigious list, I was caught
in the notion and wonder of why on earth – or how on earth it’d managed to get
there in the first place. Like, what actually made it good enough? And it
wasn’t really – or at least, it wasn’t completely – about being humble and
unassuming or in denial, it honestly developed in me more of an analytical eye and
a need and desperation to figure out how I’m NOT Disordered got there in the
first place…
I came
to the very obvious conclusion that it was the quality, the efficiency, and the
effectiveness of the content I was creating on my blog. That it must be of a
decency that it somehow stands out from other BPD blogs in the UK; but what
about it does that? I wanted to know how I’d made this achievement for two
reasons:
1.
So
that I could figure out what needed to be improved on to proceed up the list to
that coveted number one spot!
2.
To
know what I was doing right to have more, similar achievements and receive
other recognition that would help in increasing awareness of the topics I was
blogging about.
So, I
started taking real note of my statistics and watching to see which themes and
subjects in my content were the most popular and which were the least. I had –
without even really recognising it – started to really take my blogging
seriously. Like, deeming-it-to-be-a-career serious! That level! It was sort of
a sensation I’ve talked about experiencing before but I think that regardless
of having those serious thoughts, I didn’t do as much about it as I did in this
instance with the List.
The two
biggest achievements most immediately after this post – the ones which I feel
were accomplished because I had started to take things more seriously were:
featuring on Koast Radio – a local radio station – in an interview about
blogging and mental health (you can read about it here) and having Em Sheldon – a
really popular Blogger and YouTuber and a close friend to my ultimate blogging
inspiration Victoria Magrath! – feature in a ‘24hrs with…’ blog post (which you
can read here). Both blog posts ended up
being hugely popular and the one with Em really influenced my decision to use
my ‘24hrs with…’ Q&As on a regular basis with a variety of people and in a
variety of ways e.g. that Christmas I used the concept of questionnaires to run
a festive series of posts across twelve days in December in collaboration with
Cats Protection (you can read the first one here).
All of
these projects and subjects for my content – their popularity – taught me that
I was making the right choices and decisions when it came to the blog posts, I
was publishing. It showed me that if other people liked these pieces so much,
then I must at least be doing the right thing by creating them and actually,
just by thinking of creating them! Having the idea and the thought of each
piece of content felt like an achievement in itself. It also opened this window
to the notion that I was really building a bond with my readers because I had a
sense of what they wanted from me and from I’m NOT Disordered specifically. I
really liked the idea of that bond because I recognised that without my blog’s
readers, myself and my blog, literally wouldn’t be where we are today.
Reaching
One Million Readers
CELEBRATING
ONE MILLION READERS!!! | I'm NOT Disordered
A
GUIDE TO EVENTS | MY ONE MILLION READERS PARTY!!! | I'm NOT Disordered
When my
blog hit 1,000,000 readers, I couldn’t quite believe it! I mean to the degree
that it felt like winning the lottery – or at least, it was how I’d imagine it must
feel to win the lottery! I remember counting the zeros (I managed to catch the
counter on exactly one million) to make sure I was right about it being one
million because I was so sure I couldn’t have actually achieved it! Sceptical,
doesn’t even cut it! But of course, there were the right number of zeros, and I
quickly began publishing the fact I’d reached it everywhere and telling
everyone(!) – including at my local shops (namely the Card Factory!) when I
bought the ‘1’ and ‘M’ balloons which are featured in the picture at the top of
that first blog post linked above.
In this
post, I decided to choose situations, occasions, and stages in my blogging
career where I wish I’d had advice from someone with actual experience of being
a blogger and going through those same moments. Following each stage or
situation etc. – with examples of these being considering quitting and
receiving mixed feedback – I wrote five pieces of advice relevant to how a
person might be thinking or feeling in each of those instances.
I
honestly believe that peer support can be one of the most helpful and useful
types or tools – especially in mental health related – in help, support, and
providing care to a vulnerable person. And whilst a Blogger might very
obviously not be classed as ‘vulnerable’ or as necessarily having ‘mental
health needs’ this type (peer) of support or advice can end up being priceless
and invaluable for them too. I think this stems from the general human need or
craving to meet or know of someone who has similar experiences as you and who
has come through those in a way which you might be feeling sceptical as being
even possible. Peer support can bring a sense of hope and a notion of courage
and bravery by instilling in you a sense of relief that it is possible to get
through whatever you’re struggling with and that it’s incredibly likely for you
to be able to move forward in your life – on from whatever it is that might be
holding you back or keeping you stuck in one place.
Another
quality of peer support is the notion that it relieves you of feeling lonely
and isolated in your situation or problem. Thoughts and feelings of loneliness
and abandoned can be huge precipitators to a person becoming unsafe or
struggling with their mental health and feelings like happiness and being productive.
It was one reason why I was actually glad to get my BPD diagnosis all those
years ago; the idea that if an actual diagnosis existed, that meant there were
others going through the same or similar experience as me. I mean, even when my
Community Psychiatric Nurse (CPN) said she didn’t want me to have that label
because no services help people with it because “you don’t get better from
that.” I still thought that even if it meant questioning feelings of hope and doubting
the prospect of things ever improving and reaching something resembling ‘recovery,’
I’d much rather feel less alone.
A
common misconception in mental health is that psychiatric hospitals are safe
places and the best place for someone who is mentally unwell and unsafe to be. There
are many dangers and negative impacts to being an inpatient, but the one most
relevant here is that there’s a huge, unbalanced issue of whether being around
others who are struggling is a good thing or not. Of course, this is different
to peer support because that’s all about being positive, helpful, useful, and
full of empathy; but just actually being in an environment – like a psychiatric
hospital – with others struggling with their mental health, it can be
dangerous. It can often lead to negative inspiration and influence. I’ve known
other inpatients to deem self-harm as a competition and to always want to go ‘one
better’ in doing something ‘worse’ than the other person. I also remember when
another inpatient in that specialist hospital snuck a blade onto the ward and
all the girls passed it between each other! Knowing full well what the next
person was going to do with it! I mean, I’m all about honesty and so, I’d say
that yes, there’s been instances where I’ve thought or felt like self-harming
has helped me; but I would never recommend it or advise someone on different
methods. I try not to have regrets, but if I could do things over, self-harm is
one thing I definitely wouldn’t do again.
Fortunately,
giving advice on blogging and issues and situations that you might come up
against as a blogger – as I did in that first post – is a lot less complicated
and risky! It was also a lot less tricky giving advice about events – and in
particular, hosting them – as I did in the second post celebrating one million
readers. This post was obviously inspired by the party I hosted to celebrate reaching
this huge milestone and I really enjoyed how much lighter it felt; in that it
wasn’t as deep and overwhelming as my usual content about mental health can be.
It was a nice change to blog about something less controversial too because
there are so many things you can get wrong in mental health blogging – with the
main one being unintentionally triggering a person enough for them to then
utilise unsafe coping behaviours, strategies, and mechanisms.
I
really loved that in the celebrations for one million readers with these two pieces
of content on I’m NOT Disordered and the actual party itself, everything was so
light-hearted, fun, and excitable. It was just what I wanted – and just what I
felt I needed after working so hard to get to that point.
The
New Design!
Welcome
to the new and improved I’m NOT Disordered – this perhaps should have gone first
(especially with me starting the part the way I just did!) but I decided that I
really wanted to do things in chronological order.
There’s
this post whose title and content came to mind with this part… It’s this one: WHY
I CARE WHAT YOU THINK | YOU’RE NOT DISORDERED COVER REVEAL!!! | IN
COLLABORATION WITH DINKY DESIGNS FROM ETSY UK & INCLUDING A DISCOUNT
CODE!!! | I'm NOT Disordered because that’s sort of what I’m going to write
about here – that in changing the blog’s logo and layout/template, the one
thing I was most nervous about was what you would all think of it! Of course,
it’s important that I like it too and, in the process, of making the changes, I
actually also put a lot of importance into what my mum thought of it too. To
me, it’s kind of like I said earlier about recognising how my blog and I came to
be where we are today; I know that – for my blog in particular – it’s because
of the readers and for me, it’s because of my Mum’s unconditional love and
support for both my mental health and my blogging career. Neither of us would
be here without you all.
Now,
the logo actually took around 10 drafts which I annoyed my Mum with sending her
all of them to look over and ask her opinion of each! Then she’d recommend a
change to one, so I’d make that change (on Canva) and send it again… It was an
evening filled with Facebook Messenger notifications and phone calls! Ultimately
though, I enjoyed doing the logo because I enjoy using Canva – which you can easily
create a free account on here! It really aids
your creativity, and I genuinely feel like it brings your visions to life!
It's
also worth mentioning, the template/theme/layout is from Pipdig and it’s the ‘Tundra’
template – which you can view here! The
download was easy, installing it was incredibly quick, it was really just
making the little tweaks to the features and colours etc that took a little bit
of time – but I’m so happy with the finished result that it feels worthwhile!
Since
the comments function on my blog posts is removed, please feel free to send me
some feedback, thoughts, and comments to my Instagram or Twitter: @aimes_wilson
on both!
Thanks for reading this incredibly long and detailed post – I hope you’ve enjoyed it and thank you to everyone who has wished I’m NOT Disordered a Happy Birthday on social media already! You guys mean the world x
