TW | EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT BEING UNDER THE CARE OF THE CRISIS TEAM | PART ONE OF THREE

“Successful people recognize crisis as a time for change - from lesser to greater, smaller to bigger.”

Edwin Louis Cole

*This is Part One of Three*

As you may know from a previous blog post titled ‘TW | “SHE’S ACTUALLY JUMPED! GET AMBULANCE ON LIGHTS AND SIREN!” | WHAT HAPPENS BEFORE, DURING, & AFTER YOU JUMP, LESSONS LEARNT, & LOTS OF ADVICE’ (which you can read here), I’ve recently gone through a very big, unsafe relapse in my mental health recovery. On August 24^th, as a result of a delusional belief to jump from a bridge near my home, the Crisis Team told me they would be out within the next 24 hours to assess me. At their assessment – after I had jumped – they decided to prescribe Zopiclone (as one reason for my relapse was a lack of sleep) and put me on caseload stating that it would be for at least one week. As it happens, six days later, things are improving and on August 30^th, I was officially discharged. My week with them – and previous experiences under their care – have inspired and informed this blog post where I’d like to provide insight and advice around working with the Crisis Team…

TW | “SHE’S ACTUALLY JUMPED! GET AMBULANCE ON LIGHTS & SIREN!” | WHAT HAPPENS BEFORE, DURING, & AFTER YOU JUMP, LESSONS LEARNT, & LOTS OF ADVICE

“…Like, it’s physically hard to open your mouth and make the words come out. They don’t come out smooth and in conjunction with your brain the way normal people’s words do... So, you just keep quiet.”

Ned Vizzini

In the early hours of August 24^th, 2025, I jumped from a small bridge near my home which crosses a disused railway track. In this blog post, I’d like to share everything that happened before it, during it, and after it. This post is not intended as ‘attention-seeking’ but instead, to raise awareness of a lot of different issues which crop up throughout it and I want to do that (raise awareness) to help others. To help those who have also jumped, to feel less alone. To help professionals see good, helpful, and supportive work. To help provide the loved ones of those who have jumped with some sort of insight. The content also is definitely not intended as any sort of negative or unsafe influence. Nor do I want it to upset or trigger anyone – hence the ‘Trigger Warning’ in the title; if it does, please visit the blog’s Help Directory and reach out for professional support where relevant/necessary. With all of that said, thank you all for providing me with the platform to hopefully do some good with my content and to experience the personal, therapeutic benefits I receive in writing like this; I might have created I’m NOT Disordered, but it wouldn’t be where it is today without all of you – and for that, I am eternally grateful…

THE IMPORTANCE OF PEER SUPPORT IN MENTAL HEALTH | PRE-EVENT BLOG POST | IN COLLABORATION WITH TYNESIDE CATS PROTECTION

Lean on me,

When you’re not strong,

And I’ll be your friend,

I’ll help you carry on

Bill Withers: Lean On Me

Not too long ago, I spotted an event on Facebook advertising Tyneside Cats Protection’s Summer Open Day at their Adoption Centre (you can check out the event here). After not only collaborating with them – and the charity on a national basis – many times over the past few years (with our most recent one being: DAY THREE MHAW | A COMMUNITY-THEMED Q&A WITH A CAT CARE VOLUNTEER | MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS WEEK 2025 WITH CATS PROTECTION | I'm NOT Disordered), but having also attended previous Open Days at the Centre, I was eager to attend. With one of my best-friends and his partner also planning to attend, I contacted the Centre and asked whether we could all meet a few of the cats (as I have done previously in this post: ABANDONMENT & HOW TO COPE WITH IT | IN COLLABORATION WITH CATS PROTECTION | I'm NOT Disordered) and with the answer being “yes, of course!” we ended up deciding to make the entire thing into a collaboration. I found however, that I had two ideas for themes or angles that the collaboration could take, and so I agreed to publish this piece – which was inspired by Cats Protection’s Volunteer Assistance Programme (more info and their poster are at the end of this blog post – prior to the event and then another on the day/just after it…

WHAT ABOUT US? | TIPS FOR ALL THE MENTAL HEALTH SERVICES WHO ARE FAILING US

Oh, what about us?
What about all the plans that ended in disaster?
What about love? What about trust?
What about us?

P!nk: What About Us

Over six years ago, I actually wrote a blog post of a similar theme and inspired by the exact same song (P!nk: What About Us – which you can listen to here) that led to this post too (you can read that post here), so I was in two minds as to publishing this. Eventually, however, I recognised that there has been a huge increase in the blog’s readership since then, and so it’s incredibly likely that there’ll be a lot of people out there who actually haven’t seen, heard of, or read that piece. I also realised that I have a lot of new ideas and experience on this topic, so it’s likely not going to be much of a repeat at all...

JOIN A RAPE & ABUSE SURVIVOR AT A HUGE GYNAE APPOINTMENT | VLOG & A COLLABORATION WITH AMAZON UK INCLUDED!

 

I found a strength I've never known
I've been thrown out, I've been burned

When I'm finished, they won't even know your name

You brought the flames, and you put me through hell
I had to learn how to fight for myself

Ke$ha – Praying

On May 2^nd, I had to attend an appointment with Gynaecology to discuss having my smear under a general anaesthetic. I decided to film the day for two reasons: the first, was to provide empathy and advice to other survivors and those in a similar situation. The second reason was to give insight to those who judge people for not having this procedure. My general message from this? Don’t judge a person’s journey, when you haven’t walked in their shoes. In case there are people out there who are interested in this experience and don’t want to or can’t watch videos, I thought I would write a quick blog post about it too and managed to get a collaboration with Amazon UK for it! At the end, however, I’ve still also inserted the entire vlog from YouTube…

DAY SEVEN MHAW | SERIES RE-CAP & REFLECTION

“Always work hard, be honest, and be proud of who you are.”

Patricia Velasquez

Another Mental Health Awareness Week over! I feel like it actually went so quick! So, for anyone who may have missed some of the posts, I’ve added their links, a bit about each one, my thoughts and feelings upon reflection of each of them, other important links, and any lessons learnt from each post…

DAY FIVE MHAW | HOW MY LOCAL NHS MENTAL HEALTH TRUST ARE TACKLING ‘COMMUNITY’ WITH AN ‘INVOLVEMENT BANK’ | MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS WEEK 2025 WITH CUMBRIA, NORTHUMBERLAND, TYNE & WEAR NHS FOUNDATION TRUST

The Involvement Bank - Cumbria, Northumberland, Tyne and Wear NHS Foundation Trust

“Coming together is a beginning, keeping together is progress, working together is success.”

Henry Ford

I can’t believe Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW) 2025 is almost at an end; with today being the penultimate piece of content for the Week! Today’s post is in collaboration with my local NHS mental health Trust; Cumbria, Northumberland, Tyne and Wear NHS Foundation Trust (CNTW) and we’ll be looking at the largest points of discussion around this Week’s theme of ‘community’ in particular relation though, to the Trust’s genius creation and incredible operation of their Involvement Bank…

DAY TWO MHAW | HOW WAYTHROUGH ARE TACKLING ‘COMMUNITY’ | MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS WEEK 2025 WITH WAYTHROUGH

“Learn to enjoy and respect each other’s differences.”

Fred Meijer

For the second day of Mental Health Awareness Week 2025, I’ve collaborated with mental health and drug and alcohol support charity; Waythrough. Prior to Richmond Fellowship and Humankind merging, I had been under the care of Richmond Fellowship for almost ten years and was honoured to be a huge part of the communications and marketing aspects to the merger and the creation of Waythrough. In this post, I’ve chatted with another service user and fellow member of the Life Experience Council as well as Waythrough’s Inclusion Manager about how Waythrough have tackled the theme of community…

HOW MY COLLABORATION GAME HAS CHANGED IN 12 YEARS

“The purpose of life is not to be happy, but to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you lived at all.”

Leo Rosten

So, I’ve been realising that my most recent blog posts have been quite deep and overwhelming in various ways, and over my years of blogging – as I’m NOT Disordered has grown in popularity – I have found that my content which includes tips and advice for budding bloggers also proves fairly popular amongst readers. Having also literally just popped off a new Collaboration Pitch, I felt inspired to put this piece together where I’m going to do a bit of an examination of my ‘collaboration game’ from the very first partnership with the YoungMinds ‘Vs Campaign’ in 2014 to my most recent projects with the Royal College of Emergency Medicine and Newcastle Upon Tyne Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust…

“LET’S REMOVE IT FROM YOUR RECORDS, YOU’VE CLEARLY RECOVERED FROM IT!” | HOW I HAVE OVERCOME 8 SYMPTOMS OF BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER & HOW YOU CAN TOO

With every fall, I learn to stand, In the face of fear, I take command

Through the storms that try to break, I'll rise again, for my own sake

With fire in my soul, I'll light the way, In this journey of life, I'm here to stay

Feel the power, it's building inside, With every heartbeat, I won't hide

No more chains, I'll break them free, In this moment, I am me

I'll rise up stronger, no holding back, With my head held high, I'm on the right track

Rise Up Stronger: Beat-Creative

After around fifteen years of having a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) stuck to my records, I began questioning its validity a year or so ago and began seeing a Psychiatrist from Cumbria, Northumberland, Tyne and Wear NHS Foundation Trust (CNTW). After around one year of appointments, on April 1^st 2025, the Psychiatrist told me he had finally concluded that I was right; I no longer meet the diagnostic criteria for BPD and that it would now be listed as ‘historic’ in all of my records! In ascertaining that I didn’t meet the criteria (which is to have at least 5 of 9 possible symptoms) we established I had just one and when I was diagnosed, it was with the determination that I had all 9! So, considering this meant I’ve recovered from 8 symptoms of BPD, I thought I would do this blog post to chat through how I managed it in the hope that it provides advice for others and also hope for those to know you can overcome BPD…

EVERYTHING THERE IS TO KNOW ABOUT DISPUTES IN MENTAL HEALTH | INCLUDING ARGUMENTS AMONGST PROFESSIONALS & HELPFUL LINKS

“The only part of an argument that really matters is what we think of the people arguing.”

Kim Stanley Robinson

 There was a point in my mental health journey – not necessarily the recovery part – where I had this sudden realisation that disputes were becoming so frequent that they were almost natural reactions to anything even slightly worthy of disputing. The development of that automatic response meant that I actually wasn’t even realising or aware that I was doing it half of the time it was happening! Through having Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) as a psychiatric hospital inpatient, I learnt a lot about properly handling yourself to be the best possible version of yourself during a dispute, as well as learning the whole saying of choosing your battles and these are lessons, I still stand by. I – and my mental health in particular – have benefited a lot from this improved understanding and change in attitude and behaviour so I wanted to spread the new-found knowledge to others…

MY JOURNEY FACILITATING TRAINING IN MENTAL HEALTH WITH ADVICE TO HELP YOU DO IT TOO!!! | LAUNCHING UNDERSTAND WITH IND

“The great aim of education is not knowledge, but action.”

Herbert Spencer

A number of years ago, I was asked to co-facilitate mental health training for the new recruits of my local Police force (Northumbria Police) in partnership with Cumbria, Northumberland, Tyne and Wear NHS Foundation Trust (CNTW). It was my first experience of doing something like that, but it remains one of the most enjoyable, influential, and educational opportunities I’ve ever had in the entirety of my blogging career! So, since then, I’ve gone to take on a number of additional, similar commitments and with those experiences and a recent decision in mind, I have created Understand with IND and its five Training Programmes. To launch it and acknowledge its feature in the brand-new pages on I’m NOT Disordered, I’ve put together this piece which is full of accounts of my experiences in facilitating training around mental health as well as things I’ve learnt from them, and advice I would give to budding facilitators…

HOW I EARNED THE OPPORTUNITY TO GIVE A SPEECH AT THE EMTA CONFERENCE FOR THE ROYAL COLLEGE OF EMERGENCY MEDICINE, ALL THE ADVICE I’D GIVE, & A HUGE THANK YOU | #EMTA2025

"Action will delineate and define you."

Thomas Jefferson

When the Royal College of Emergency Medicine (RCEM) asked me to write another blog post after the event (I published one before the Conference; which you can read, here), I struggled to think what angle or theme I would use for it. So, I thought about why people come to I’m NOT Disordered anyway, and really, it’s typically about looking for advice and accounts of situations they’ve been in too – accounts which bring hope of recovery and tips on coping. But I also wanted to recognise that my life – and that of so many others – doesn’t revolve around trauma and mental illness. So, I created this post which contains a thank you, a couple of videos from the event, and is also full of advice and thoughts on the three actions I've taken which, I believe, led to me being invited to speak at this prestigious conference hosted by the Emergency Medicine Trainee Association (EMTA)….

WHEN & WHY IT STARTED, WITNESSING IT IN OTHERS, & HOW I CAME THROUGH IT | SELF-HARM AWARENESS DAY 2025

“Resilience isn't a single skill. It's a variety of skills and coping mechanisms. To bounce back from bumps in the road as well as failures...”

Jean Chatzky

This year, for Self-Harm Awareness Day, I thought I’d create this slightly(!) jumbled-up post and it is honestly, mostly a mess because I actually just found out it was this Awareness Day at about half three in the afternoon on the day of it! So, this post is basically full of bits and pieces about my experiences of self-harm, things related to self-harm which I’ve learnt and witnessed throughout my mental health journey, and advice I would give to someone who is utilising it as a coping skill…

WHY I’M PRESENTING AT THE EMTA CONFERENCE FOR THE ROYAL COLLEGE OF EMERGENCY MEDICINE & EXCLUSIVE INSIGHT INTO MY PRESENTATION! | #EMTA2025

“Be spectacularly great at what you do. Wear your passion on your sleeve and hold your heart in the palm of your hand. And work hard. Really hard.”

Robin S. Sharma

EMTA (@EMTAcommittee) / X

RCEM Events (@RCEMevents) / X

A number of years ago, I was asked to attend and blog at an event at a local University, and ever since, I’ve kept in touch with the Doctor who invited me. Then, a few weeks ago, she got in touch with me and offered me one of the largest and most prestigious opportunity that I think I’ve ever been offered – an invitation to speak at the National Conference for the Royal College of Emergency Medicine! It was one of those situations where you try to play it cool and act like things like this happen all the time… But actually, all that coolness went out the window and I just said: “oh my goodness! Are you serious?!” After a few emails with the lovely Conference and Events Officer, and confirmation of my train tickets and accommodation, I asked if I could announce my presentation on, I’m NOT Disordered and across my social media and was told “yes, please!” So, I’m going to use this opportunity to talk through a lot of the reasons why I’m doing this, to publish some feedback and comments from various professionals, and to provide some exclusive insight into my PowerPoint...

THE 12 BIGGEST MOMENTS IN MY BLOGGING CAREER & A WHOLE NEW LOOK | HAPPY 12th BIRTHDAY, I’M NOT DISORDERED!!!

I’m going to start in a very stereotypical way right now; I cannot believe I’m writing a blog post for I’m NOT Disordered’s TWELTH Birthday! Like, where did the years go?! How did they whiz by so fast that I feel like I barely even noticed them? Yet, at the same time, I remember how very hard I’ve worked and how many amazing opportunities I’ve had/done. Whilst this twelfth Birthday has me feeling quite old, I’m also very grateful for it being a chance to reflect on my blogging career and pick out twelve amazing moments that I feel have really contributed to my blog’s success and my own skills, talents, and experience. You might also notice; the blog has a whole new look and a brand-new logo! This has been in the planning for a while now and a lot of thought has gone into it, so I really hope you all like it…

AN AMAZON MENTAL HEALTH CHRISTMAS GIFT GUIDE FOR YOU | IN COLLABORATION WITH AMAZON UK

 “When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.”

Jean Shinoda Bolen

Now, something a bit different to the typical Christmas Gift Guides that are likely all over the blogs you read/follow. I’ve said before, I recognise that I’m NOT Disordered readers don’t come here for Gift Guides and I’m 100% confident that there are Bloggers who do Gift Guides a hell of a lot better than I do! I do, however, also recognise that a Gift Guide like this – items and products which I believe could help your mental health – is so relevant and appropriate for readers and that it could very well prove to actually be helpful for a lot of people! So, I’ve scoured Amazon and have gotten creative with some insight and ideas into the variety of things that people find helpful for their mental health; but I recommend you consider purchasing something from this post for yourself. And know that this isn’t, at all, being selfish; it's about self-care and recognising the importance of your own emotional wellbeing, especially at this time of Year…

ABANDONMENT & HOW TO COPE WITH IT | IN COLLABORATION WITH CATS PROTECTION

“When you feel abandoned, don't let painful feelings fester. Instead, use them as a catalyst to grow and to become more compassionate.”

Amy Morin

So, collaboration number two with the wonderful Cats Protection – this time, however, the post is in partnership with the charity on a national level rather than with my local Tyneside Adoption Centre (the collaboration with which, you can read here). So, as I mentioned in that piece, the Winter Campaign theme for Cats Protection this year is ‘abandonment’ and the reason for this (which I don’t think I mentioned in the other post) is that cases of abandonment of cats have massively risen by over 30%! Additionally, Cats Protection have found that those cats spend on average, around 39 days in the care of the Charity before finding a ‘furever’ home. With donations of as little as £5 feeding a cat – and last year, they helped around 500 cats per day! – in the Charity’s care for 25 days (other funding equivalents are that £15 would cover worming treatment for three cats, and £20 would fund ten blankets to keep the cats warm and safe); this Winter Campaign is aimed at raising funds as well as awareness of this hugely important issue. Now, to bring this Campaign into relevance for the typical content of I’m NOT Disordered, I thought I’d use this post to write about how to cope with the largest instance of abandonment that I think a psychiatric service user can experience, feeling abandoned by mental health services…

RELATING TO DEFYING GRAVITY LYRICS FROM THE MUSICAL: WICKED

“Happy is what happens when all your dreams come true.”

Stephen Schwartz, Thank Goodness, Wicked: The Musical

If you have a social media account, you’ll likely agree with me when I say that Wicked is everywhere right now! The release of the new movie, starring Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo, is based on the original musical and it seems to be really trending right now – especially their skit for Jimmy Fallon (which you can watch here). And so, I decided to jump on the bandwagon with this blog post where I’ll be picking out some lyrics (you can read all of them here) from the Wicked song; Defying Gravity and illustrating how I relate to each bit…

BLOGVEMBER 2024 | DAY SEVENTEEN | COPING WITH THIS STAGE