FOR MY SOUL CAT RUBY | WISHING MY CAT A VERY HAPPY 3rd BIRTHDAY!!!

"You feel more like home to me than any place I've ever been."

Angela N. Blount

RUBY’S BIRTHDAY WISHLIST | THE ULTIMATE GIFT GUIDE TO HIGH BUDGET AND LOW BUDGET GIFTS FOR YOUR CAT!!! | FEATURING AMAZON UK, PET PLANET, & PETS AT HOME

“Love the giver more than the gift.”

Brigham Young

35: AN AGE NO ONE THOUGHT I’D REACH | HOW REPORTING MY TRAUMA WAS MORE LIFE-SAVING THAN MENTAL HEALTH SERVICES | IT’S MY BIRTHDAY TODAY!!!

“The best revenge is the massive success.”

Frank Sinatra

It sounds dramatic to say that I can’t believe I made it to 35, but when I tell you that, on numerous occasions, even the professionals – mostly Psychiatrists, but also two ICU Doctors – made comments that they couldn’t envision me making it to my ‘next’ Birthday (mostly between the ages of 18 and 23!) … perhaps now you’ll see the rationale to my surprise that I’m still here?! It meant that I was originally going to centre this Birthday blog post around reasons why I believe I managed to make it to this age, but I found out that I’d done something incredibly similar for my 28^th Birthday (you can read it here) and my 31^st (which you can read here)! In thinking about the reasons, I made it, I realised that I’d list reporting my trauma as the first one – even though I had interactions with mental health services before that which most would probably assume should getting help and support, should have been the first life-saving thing to happen. So, I decided to focus on that…

A POEM FOR MY (ALMOST) STEP-DAD! | HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DADDY BEAR!

MY BIRTHDAY WISHLIST | IN PART COLLABORATION WITH WARDOW

“The way I see it, you should live every day like it’s your Birthday!”

Paris Hilton

With my Birthday in just a couple of weeks (February 1^st), I’ve been looking through my saved lists on my favourite websites for something to treat myself to and thanks to Wardow, I finally managed to purchase my favourite Valentino! It’s honestly been in my ‘love list’ for around six or seven months – though it feels like forever! – but full price, it was £130.50 and whilst I did feel that it was worth it because of its brand and it’s pretty huge(!), that is still a lot of money when you have bills to pay! Fortunately, however, Wardow helped me out and then they also had a discount code (WINTER – it should still be valid when this post is published) which gives you 10% off. Then, I also had over £10 in ‘points’ (you receive loyalty points per £1 you spend) on my account from previous purchases so I managed to get it for less than half price!! Inspired by this, I decided to create my Birthday wishlist where I’ve looked through my – probably – three favourite retail sites and my go-to’s for Birthday gifts: ASOS, Wardow, and Amazon UK for goodies of all different prices. Hopefully you’ll be inspired for any upcoming Birthdays for your friends or family or, as I have done, for yourself…

DEFINED BY THIRTEEN NOT BY DISORDER | HAPPY 13TH BIRTHDAY, I’M NOT DISORDERED!

“The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.”

Oprah Winfrey

Today, I’m NOT Disordered turns – believe it or not! – THIRTEEN years old(!) and, as usual, I wanted to do something special this year… So, exclusive for this week alone, the blog’s logo had a little Canva-style (using the ‘Elements’ feature) tweaking – what do you think?! And this Birthday blog post will be about the thirteen things from this past year which I’d like to think of as defining of me because I’d far rather be defined by those, than the diagnosis which I was stuck with for over a decade. Except, because being defined by things is actually all about the opinions of others and why they see certain things in certain ways, I asked AI (namely Chat GPT) to tell me why each of the thirteen things below is defining of me; so here’s the thirteen things I chose and each of the AI answers…

AN AMAZON UK BUNNY BIRTHDAY WISH LIST | THE ELDEST IS ALMOST FOUR!!

“The kindness one does for one animal may not change the world, but it will change the world of that one animal.”

Unknown

Now, you know that I like to try to disperse light-hearted content on my blog as a means of breaking up the very heavy and emotional posts I typically publish. Of course, this often feels like a waste of time because people likely aren’t coming to, I’m NOT Disordered for this kind of content, and I actually sometimes worry that I’ll lose readers, but from Day One my blog has been about what I benefit from writing about… My eldest pet (I have three – a second bunny and a cat too!) Luna will be FOUR YEARS OLD on October 1^st and so we sat down together (as you do!) and put together a wish list of treats and toys from Amazon UK. We thought we’d share it with you all for any fellow bunnies/bunny owners who are deserving of some lovely bits and pieces too! There are a few absolute bargains in it! Enjoy…

LOOKING BACK OVER THE TWO YEARS WITH MY FLUFFY SOULMATE | ALSO INCLUDING MY FAVOURITE CAT BITS FROM ETSY | HAPPY 2nd BIRTHDAY, MY LITTLE RUBY | IN COLLABORATION WITH ETSY UK

“Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.”

Richard Bach

Even though for my two mini-Lionhead bunnies (Luna and Gracie) I celebrate their ‘Gotcha Day’ as their Birthday, I know Ruby’s actual date of birth(!), and so her Birthday is marked on March 26^th. This year, for her second Birthday, I’ll be looking over the previous two years with her, realising she’s my fluffy soulmate, reminiscing over my favourite moments together, and reflecting on some of the things I’ve learnt from loving her. I’ll also pepper the post with some of my favourite cat items and products on Etsy UK right now…

TURNING 34!!! | EVERYTHING I THOUGHT I’D BE BY NOW

You shoot me down,

But I won’t fall,

I am titanium

David Guetta ft. Sia: Titanium

In a recent blog post for I’m NOT Disordered’s 12^th Birthday, I was going through my archives of old blog posts, and I happened across one from my 26^th Birthday (which you can read here) where I made a bit of a huge statement about where I’d like to be by the age of 33 and it’s something that I definitely haven’t achieved. It’s also something which I no longer even strive towards. So, it got me thinking about all the things I thought I’d be or have achieved by now and about how much life can change and develop and sometimes, rather than feel let-down and disappointed, we just have to grow and change too. We have to recognise that maybe it wasn’t meant to happen and that because something else has come along, it doesn’t at all mean that you’ve failed in some way. It’s about being accepting of change and recognising the potential opportunities and strength it can bring to you rather than zoning in and concentrating on any negatives and feelings of being unprepared or unwilling to take on something new and unexpected. I feel these are skills and mindsets which I’ve managed to gradually develop over the last decade, and I wanted to share with you how things around education and career have changed for me and how I’ve coped with these shifts in my life…

THE 12 BIGGEST MOMENTS IN MY BLOGGING CAREER & A WHOLE NEW LOOK | HAPPY 12th BIRTHDAY, I’M NOT DISORDERED!!!

I’m going to start in a very stereotypical way right now; I cannot believe I’m writing a blog post for I’m NOT Disordered’s TWELTH Birthday! Like, where did the years go?! How did they whiz by so fast that I feel like I barely even noticed them? Yet, at the same time, I remember how very hard I’ve worked and how many amazing opportunities I’ve had/done. Whilst this twelfth Birthday has me feeling quite old, I’m also very grateful for it being a chance to reflect on my blogging career and pick out twelve amazing moments that I feel have really contributed to my blog’s success and my own skills, talents, and experience. You might also notice; the blog has a whole new look and a brand-new logo! This has been in the planning for a while now and a lot of thought has gone into it, so I really hope you all like it…

DEAR LUNA, HAPPY THIRD BIRTHDAY

Dear Luna,

I feel like the way a pet comes into your life says so much about the bond and relationship you’re going to have. It’s like a hint or a sign of what’s to come. If you find a pet as a stray or if you adopt them from a shelter or buy them from a store… The difference in a beginning can hold a lot of importance for the journey you’re going to have together. And I believe that our beginning was no different…

AN OPEN LETTER TO RUBY IN THE RUN-UP TO HER FIRST BIRTHDAY!!! | PLUS HER BIRTHDAY WISHLIST!!!

Lying close to you, feeling your heart beating,

And I’m wondering what you’re dreaming,

Wondering if it’s me you’re seeing,

Then I kiss your eyes,

And thank God we’re together,

And I just wanna stay with you in this moment forever.

Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing – Aerosmith

In the almost automatic decision – which didn’t feel like a decision because it felt so predictable and natural(!) – to write a blog post celebrating my kitten’s first Birthday on March 26^th, I toyed between writing it as a little letter and writing a full-on, detailed piece about pets and mental health. In the end, I decided to do both! So, here’s Ruby’s letter and on the 26^th the other post will go up…

I’M TURNING 33!!!

*This post is a bit of a follow-in from my previous post where I picked apart some of my Birthday blog posts, you can read it here*

Unfortunately – or fortunately, depending on how you look at it – there’s a huge mental health awareness date (Time To Talk Day) taking place on my actual Birthday of February 1^st, and since I have a really special piece of content already lined up to mark that date; I thought I’d post my Birthday blog posts beforehand. Now, a genuine ‘unfortunately,’ is that due to a new commitment (which I can’t quite talk about just yet) I’m unable to complete the thought behind my Birthday posts which was to split all my Birthday blog posts up and go through each of them talking about the bits that stand out, what has changed, what’s stayed the same… So, in addition to the previous blog post I’ve linked at the beginning of this one, I managed to write about my 26^th Birthday blog post and then I’ve put together a little reel at the end of the post…

PART ONE: PICKING APART MY BIRTHDAY BLOG POSTS | I’M TURNING 33!!!

*This post is part one to a series*

Unfortunately – or fortunately, depending on how you look at it – there’s a huge mental health awareness date (Time To Talk Day) taking place on my actual Birthday of February 1^st, and since I have a really special piece of content already lined up to mark that date; I thought I’d post my Birthday blog post now. I kind of feel like it was a very grown-up decision to make – to prioritise a more career-appropriate post over my Birthday one! And I actually had a ton of ideas of angles for this blog post, but in tracking down the links for every blog post from all my previous Birthdays since creating I’m NOT Disordered, I decided to have a real look through each of them and pick out some bits and pieces that I wanted to reflect on…

HAPPY 11TH BIRTHDAY I'M NOT DISORDERED | A REEL OF BLOGGING CAREER MEMORIES & A HUGE BALLOON!!!

AND THE YEAR 2023 IS COMING TO AN END… | PART TWO

“She remembered who she was, and the game changed.”

Lalah Deliah

*YOU CAN READ PART ONE HERE* 

Pimkie Suede Knee High Boot: £51.00

Embellished Jumper: £40.00

Too Faced Better Than Sex Waterproof Mascara: £13.00

e.l.f Liquid Glitter Eyeshadow: £6.00

Brave Soul Cardigan: £42.00

THE TWO NEW ADDITIONS TO THE FAMILY: GRACIE & RUBY

With my calico rescue cat, Emmy, being put to sleep in October 2022, we started off the year as a family of two with just Luna (my black and white mini-Lionhead lop eared bunny) and I. But when Emmy was put to sleep, I asked the Vet what the best thing would be for Luna and almost without seeming to take the time to think about it, she replied with “get her a friend.” As the weeks went by without Emmy though, I found myself enjoying building a better bond with Luna who had always just spent the majority of her time following Emmy around and had never really been affectionate with me. Without Emmy though, she was now following me around the home (my bunnies are free-roam) and was always stretching up on her back feet to nudge me for a stroke or a cuddle. Then she started taking the cat tunnel in her mouth and running with it in circles; myself and everyone else who either saw when they visited the house or watched my videos of her doing it, laughed and thought it was really cute. But actually; it turned out to have been a form of repetitive behaviour that illustrated boredom and loneliness.

A FEW IMPORTANT BITS & PIECES FROM THE PAST YEAR | CELEBRATING MY 32nd BIRTHDAY!!

“Thirty two!”

“I know! How did I manage it?!”

“A lot of hard work!”

As if I’ve made it to thirty-two!! Having started to take a number of actions that could have very likely killed me when I was eighteen, a number of mental health professionals openly stated that they’d be surprised if I made it to my nineteenth Birthday. In all honesty, I also couldn’t imagine me ever getting to this age! And obviously, for a very long time, I didn’t even want to make it that far! I mean, I actually had this really intense belief for well over a year where I was convinced that I had been put on this earth purely to commit suicide and die at a young age so that it drew attention to the failures within psychiatric services. And it took A LOT of therapy to help me work through that and I think that the ultimate aid in this, was I’m NOT Disordered; because blogging truly feels like I have a purpose in life. Like, I believe this is what I was put here to do. This, is why I have gone through all that I have…

MY 32ND BIRTHDAY WISHLIST

Anyone who’s read I’m NOT Disordered for a little while or who know me, will definitely not be surprised by this post! I talked a lot about my enjoyment and the importance of creating gift guides and wishlists through Blogmas 2022, and with my Birthday coming up (February 1^st), it probably seemed like a no-brainer for me to produce content like this! I hope you like this and that it inspires ideas for gifts for someone you know too!

EVERYTHING ALL OF YOU MEAN TO ME | I’M NOT DISORDERED’S 10TH BIRTHDAY PARTY

For the third time in my blogging career, I hosted another party to celebrate a milestone I’m NOT Disordered and I have reached (the previous two were for reaching 100,000 readers and then reaching 1,000,000), and I have to admit, I think it was actually my favourite one of them all! With the previous two events being quite large and formal, I wanted to do something more informal and intimate. I mean, at the 100k party, I had 100 guests and a few were merely plus one’s for the people who I did know! And then not many people were able to come to my one million party because of the coronavirus pandemic and subsequent lockdown. So, keeping in mind that nothing ever goes perfectly, I decided to host this party at a local café (Dolly Dimples) for nine of the most important people in my life and it’s that which has inspired this post about how much all of the party attendees, and you (as my readers) mean to me…

10 THOUGHTS, ADVICE, ‘PINCH-ME’ MOMENTS, RECOMMENDATIONS, & A SERIOUSLY MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT!!! | HAPPY 10TH BIRTHDAY, I’M NOT DISORDERED

“When you start living the life of your dreams, there will always be obstacles, doubters, mistakes, and setbacks along the way. But with hard work, perseverance, and self-belief, there is no limit to what you can achieve.”

Roy Bennette

 I feel like, there’s been a lot of instances – particularly recently – where I’ve made the comment “I can’t believe that this is happening…” and this blog post celebrating I’m NOT Disordered’s 10^th Birthday, is definitely one of those occasions…

I guess that the most obvious place to start is by talking about the creation of the blog way back in 2013…

In the summer of 2012 – after three years in and out of both psychiatric and medical hospitals – a psychiatrist recommended I be admitted to a hospital specialising in my diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder. I had an assessment with one unit, and they conceded that they couldn’t accept my flight risk. On my second assessment with the hospital in Bradford (over 100 miles away from home) they were happy to admit me, but I refused to go after hearing of their very structured, intense, and rigid way of running things. The sound of a therapeutic timetable and wake-up/lights-off times, felt overwhelming and unappealing.